Wednesday, November 17, 2010

wow it's already mid-nov...

Wow the end of the year is flying...   the past couple of weeks have been kind of busy.  I FINALLY rolled off my Lilly project (at least for a little while) and had 2 weeks at home to do nothing.  I had 2 appts with the IF clinic but other than that I didn't do too much.  Went to OC with my momma for the day and got most of my christmas shopping done.  I also got the house cleaned out of crap (made almost $500 with ebay old tech items) and tried to keep myself some what busy.  I am back in work up in Winnipeg Canada.  It's COLD and snowy up here but pretty neat.  I'm only here this week and then I'm home for Thanksgiving week....  I then am off to Dallas for 3 weeks until Christmas.  I'll be working at Texas Instruments, so it should be pretty cool.  Finally I have the last 2 weeks off at home for Christmas/NYE.  YAY!!!  Gonna be a crazy couple of weeks, I'm sure :)

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Life sucks!!

Disclaimer - if you want to read happy-cheery type of things, so somewhere else!

Welp after another HIGH bloodtest and a ultrasound that doesn't show a right ovary (can't find it) nor does it have any eggs....  the clinic has finally said that they can't do anything else for me unless I want to do DE IVF.

Life sucks, it really does.  There is nothing that will make me feel better at the moment(except if someone could make me fertile).  I don't know how to explain it.  I wish I was working this week and not home by myself.  I need my mind busy with mindless things and not thoughts that I can't have children like a normal person.   I feel a choice has been taken from me and I didn't get to choose.   No one understands and nor do I expect them too.

Adoption....  Let me vent about that one too.... just because I can't have kids does not mean that I have to adopt children.  ANYONE can adopt even if you can pop out 18 kids.  Back off me and don't suggest it either.  I know my options, the clinic has already defined them for me.

I HATE Facebook!  It's the devil because all I see is people with their smiling children, happy pregnancy, etc....  Great for them, sucks for me!

Yes I'm having a pity party and I really don't care at the moment!